Something about Durban

I want to write about Paris. But this reminds me that I didn't write about Durban. So I'm going to try and begin with that.

Durban Durban. I was so stressed out, as I'm usually when I travel these days. It was a long fight to get there. I basically got outed in the process. 

The whole luggage thing destroyed the trip. I was stressed about clothing and money the whole time. This took away from my planning energy. I felt sapped.

But let's try to remember the good times. Meeting the beautiful Moroccan, Tunisian and Lebanese friends was very heart warming. I have to visit Morocco soon. I think it will replenish my energy and full my desire to be in a country that gives me life. 

That night I spend with Zak. That hot Armenian guy. The guy that tried to hook me up from in front of the Frenchies hotel. When I made friends with the Nigerian, and got hooked up by another just in front of him. That whole police station incident. Dancing to the beats of afrohouse while completely stoned. I think I even masturbated in the toilet. That kiss with the trans guy. Making out with the beautiful woman. Grinding with the south African girl at the bar. Evading sex with the frenchies. Having my feet massaged at the positive lounge. Meeting the trans mama and her girls. Other short endearing encounters during the conference. Bussy and the south African young boy. 

On a deeper level, some reflections arose. Being there is a strong reminder of the privilege and protections we have living here. As positives and otherwise. I remember being mad at not being able to take the metro, and how that reminded me quickly of how spoiled I got.  

The energy of being openly positive gave me the impulse to disclose to two Berliner friends. Maybe it was the weed I smoked though. 

The off experiences with Bob and Sadiq made me feel that being with a person of color is not everything. Maybe I am saying that because of how I felt about Gianmarco and that I was trying to convince myself that it can work. It's true that being with a nonwhite is not enough.